The moment a woman steps into a role long defined by men, she is forced to confront questions most leaders never have to face. What does it mean to hold power when others doubt your right to it? How do you set boundaries when expectations are rooted in stereotypes? And how do you reclaim your identity when the world tries to shape it for you?
These questions sit at the heart of the journey shared in Rabbi, Your Cleavage Is Showing by Michal Mendelsohn, one of the earliest female rabbis in North America.
Power takes many forms. For early female clergy, it rarely began with authority or acceptance. Instead, it started with the inner strength to stand in spaces where women were not expected to lead. Michal Mendelsohn describes moments when she entered classrooms, pulpits, or community meetings and sensed immediate resistance. Some people questioned her ability. Others questioned her presence. This experience is familiar to many women in leadership roles who must learn to define power as confidence rather than control.
In her story, power becomes the ability to stay grounded when her role as a rabbi is minimized or challenged. She learned that power is not the approval of others. It is the steady insistence that her voice and knowledge are valued and belong in the room.
Being a rabbi often blurs the lines between personal and professional life. Being a female rabbi in the 1970s added another layer of complexity. Michal Mendelsohn faced comments about her appearance, her clothing, and her behavior that male colleagues rarely experienced. These moments underscore why boundaries are not optional for women in leadership. They are essential.
She learned to set limits on what conversations were appropriate and what expectations she would no longer accept. For example, when community members focused more on her body than her message, she had to redirect the discussion back to her work. When critics questioned her decisions more harshly than they questioned her male peers, she learned to draw a clear line between reasonable feedback and unfair scrutiny. These experiences show how healing from sexism often begins with the complicated but straightforward act of saying no.
Part of reclaiming one’s identity involves regaining a sense of worth that criticism and bias can erode. Michal Mendelsohn did this by reminding herself why she pursued the rabbinate in the first place. Her motivation was rooted in community, education, and a deep personal connection to Jewish life. When outside pressure made her doubt herself, these commitments helped her regain clarity.
Rebuilding self-worth also came through understanding that leadership does not mean perfection. It means honesty. Michal Mendelsohn’s memoir demonstrates that women in faith leadership are permitted to struggle, question themselves, and start anew. This process is part of forming absolute spiritual autonomy, something she could not have developed without surviving the challenges she faced.
Identity is never fixed. For a pioneer like Michal Mendelsohn, her identity was shaped by childhood experiences, her years in Israel, her time in rabbinical school, and the constant need to stand firm in who she was. Her story reminds us that reclaiming identity is not an act of defiance. It is an act of self-respect.
For readers who want to understand how a woman in a groundbreaking role learned to protect herself, trust herself, and grow into her own authority, Rabbi, Your Cleavage Is Showing by Michal Mendelsohn offers powerful insight.
